Navigating and traversing a surrogacy journey can be daunting, to say the least, but how can a husband support his wife through this process? An Intended Father who recently went through the surrogacy process gives his advice below.
- Take as many of the administrative aspects of the journey off your wife’s plate as possible. Having a conversation about this at the beginning will reassure her that you’ve got critical parts of the process covered.
- There’s a fair amount of legalese, contracting language, phone calls, insurance questions that you can easily handle and your wife won’t have to worry about it.
- Recognize that just because she isn’t going through the physical part of pregnancy doesn’t mean she’s not going to feel a lot of the same emotions. Being ready to support with something as simple as a hug is really important.
- Be a part of the relationship with your surrogate. This will help both your wife and your surrogate know they are a priority in your life.
- Stay well ahead of where you think you should be with baby preparations. There’s no way to be completely prepared, but if you know you have a goal to be done with painting the nursery by the end of the second trimester and you delay this, it just adds stress for both of you.
- Know important milestones and find ways to celebrate them. Something as simple as a text message or a short note lets your wife know that you’re actively engaged and excited about the process.
- Make it a priority to be present for anything and everything you possibly can, whether medical appointments or something as simple as a planned phone call with your surrogate.
- Allow yourselves to feel excitement and joy. This was challenging for us given all the ups and downs through fertility treatments, IVF, etc. and we approached the entire journey with a “cautious optimism” mantra. It’s okay, though, to be excited. There will be times you have to be each other’s cheerleaders.
- Finally, know that once you hold your child in your arms the first time, all the stress and anxiety of the process will immediately melt away.
If you have questions on how you can support your spouse through this process, we would be happy to help! Feel free to reach out to us at www.SurrogateSolutions.net today. We will come alongside you and guide you through this beautiful process.
-Written by an IF with Surrogate Solutions