Do’s and Don’ts for First Time IPs


Trusting another woman, as well as her family and your agency, with carrying your baby can be stressful. No matter how close you keep contact, you won’t be able to be involved with every step every single day throughout the entire duration of the pregnancy. If this is your first time being IPs, we suggest that you keep a few points in mind to help ensure your sanity as well as your peace of mind.


  • Trust. Put your full trust in your surrogate, agency, doctors, and attorneys. Although this may be your first pregnancy, it won’t be for most parties involved, and it’s important for you to feel comfortable with the process.
  • Ask questions. If you’re unsure of something, ask! Although it’s an amazing journey, the different steps on the path of surrogacy can be confusing, especially for first timer IPs. No question is a silly question, so don’t be afraid to speak up and ask.
  • Lean on your support system. Rely on your spouse, family, friends, agency, and surrogate. Be open and honest in your discussions with them. If you need it, do not hesitate to work with a counselor to help you work through the emotional challenges you may face during this evolving time in your life.


  • Ignore. Always be cognizant of your surrogate’s wishes and feelings. If she expresses she is uncomfortable with something, respect her and give her space. Think how you would like to be treated if you were pregnant, and treat your surrogate in that fashion. Small gestures and simply saying, “thank you” can speak volumes.
  • Try to be Superwoman. Although you may not be carrying your baby, you are still going through the process of nesting and preparing your home and life for the addition of a newborn. Don’t be afraid to ask for help!

Being a first time IP can be a bit overwhelming and confusing at first, but it doesn’t have to stay that way! Simply staying mindful of your surrogate’s feelings and doing little things here and there to show your appreciation can go a long way; however, don’t neglect your own feelings! Surrounding yourself with your support system will help you de-stress and stay excited during this special and exciting time in your life. If you are looking into surrogacy to help build your family and would like additional information on what to expect during first time surrogacy, contact Surrogate Solutions today!

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