Making the decision to become a Surrogate is the first step of a rewarding journey. For Melissa, her path to becoming a Surrogate began when she became pregnant with her first son and then turned into a reality after her second son was born. Feeling the joy of motherhood made Melissa think about all the people who could not have children of their own, and she wanted to help them experience the joy she felt, too.
During a doctor’s visit, Melissa mentioned her interest in surrogacy. Her doctor responded warmly, telling Melissa that she would not only be a wonderful Surrogate, but she even happened to know a couple looking for one. Since an agency was not involved, the couple’s doctor contacted Melissa to set up an initial meeting. Although both parties hit it off and the process began, Melissa did not get pregnant. The Intended Parents learned they would need to use an egg donor to proceed, something they were not comfortable with, and so they parted ways. However, Melissa’s surrogacy journey was far from over.
Soon after her first attempt, Melissa contacted her lawyer for help finding surrogacy assistance. During her first journey, Melissa felt unable to speak openly with the IPs because she didn’t want to burden them more, but did not want to go through feeling alone again. Her lawyer put her in contact with Gayle from Surrogate Solutions, and Melissa was soon matched with a couple. This time, she had an advocate by her side every step of the way.
Melissa’s second journey was a double success – at 35 weeks, she delivered twins! Melissa still hears from the twins’ parents on occasion and receives photos showing her how happy and healthy both of the babies she carried are today.
Melissa’s surrogacy journey did not end there; seven months later, she was matched with another couple and is currently 10 weeks pregnant with their baby. According to Melissa,
“Being a surrogate is the second most rewarding thing I have done so far in my life – second only to being a wife and mother of course!”
Each surrogacy journey is unique and will have its own sets of joys and challenges. For Melissa, her greatest challenge to overcome was communication. Although all of the couples Melissa has worked with have been thankful to her, each had a different level of involvement. While her current IPs attend every doctor appointment and check in on her frequently, her previous IPs lived out of state and were unable to attend any appointments until the delivery, so Gayle stepped in and accompanied Melissa to her most important doctor visit, the anatomy scan.
The relationship between you and your IPs is very important and should be discussed in depth with the help of the agency, who will be there every step of the way. As Melissa puts it,
“Don’t be afraid to ask questions. No one is going to chastise you for asking questions. Ask your agency, ask your lawyer, ask your IPs, or find a supportive group on the internet. Most likely, your IPs will be just as confused with the process as you are! You are never alone – many women are going through exactly what you are!”
Your agency exists to help you through every step of your journey. Their job is to be an accessible advocate for you, clear up any confusion between parties, and make the dream of having a child a reality. If you are interested in learning more about surrogacy, do not hesitate to contact Surrogate Solutions today!
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